Get ready to scroll! It’s my Top 50 Records of 2015.
Why did I put this level of effort into this? Because I have nothing better to do with my life!
Click the album name for a song to listen to!

Enjoy:

50. Panopticon – Autumn Eternal
49. Palm – Trading Basics
48. Clarence Clarity – No Now
47. Godspeed You! Black Emperor – Asunder, Sweet and Other Distress
46. The Weather Station – Loyalty
45. 2814 –新しい日の誕生 (Birth Of A New Day)
44. Steve Gunn & Black Twig Pickers – Seasonal Hire
43. Skylar Spence – Prom King
42. Seoul – I Become A Shade
41. Empress Of – Me
40. Daniel Bachman – River
39. Colleen – Captain Of None
38. Arca – Mutant
37. Jamie xx – In Colour
36. Young Fathers – White Men Are Black Men Too
35. Alex G – Beach Music
34. Mac DeMarco – Another One
33. Torres – Sprinter
32. Natalie Prass – Natalie Prass
31. Yowler – The Offer
30. Panda Bear – Panda Bear Meets The Grim Reaper
29. Prurient – Frozen Niagara Falls
28. Saintseneca – Such Things
27. Chelsea Wolfe – Abyss
26. Julien Baker – Sprained Ankle
25. Ava Luna – Infinite House
24. Roman A Clef – Abandonware
23. Carly Rae Jepsen – E•MO•TION
22. Tame Impala – Currents
21. Beach House – Depression Cherry

20. Majical Cloudz – Are You Alone?

2015, for the most part, wasn’t fun. I carved out a pretty sizable hiding place in the contours of this record. A place that allowed wallowing and healing, mostly the former though. Hey no running on the side of the pool you’re gonna break your dang neck and we’re gonna get sued out the ass by your soccer-ass mom and dad. Jeez. Dang kids.

18. Chastity Belt – Time To Go Home

Nothing’s serious, everything’s a joke.

18. Jessica Pratt – On Your Own Love Again

A spider queen is elegantly weaving a wondrous web shaded with psychedelic hues around your head, showing you the marvels of the universe. “What the heck is in this web” you wonder. “Wouldn’t you like to know,” she coos, as your new form begins to take shape.

17. Eskimeaux – O.K.

There are a lot of really important lyrics on this album. I think it came at an appropriate time in my life. “Nothing in this world is holier than friendship…” I’ll keep that in mind.

16. Sufjan Stevens – Carrie & Lowell

The master of sad-yet-beautiful continues to master his trade, this time stabbing the sword deep within himself, showing the listener his glistening, gorgeous blood that came from his familial past.

15. Braids – Deep In The Iris

This is the best synth pop record of 2015. There was not a better “synth pop” record from this year. If you disagree, that’s your own opinion. This was my opinion. Thanks for reading. Haha.

14. Krill – A Distant Fist Unclenching

R.I.P. for real. Great band.

13. Kamasi Washington – The Epic

Big jazz man takes over! Watch out! He’s a really cool person! He’ll make you a fan even if you don’t wanna be one!

12. Viet Cong – Viet Cong

Imagine some kind of bizarro factory where people just pull levers & press buttons all day and nothing gets done, but each employee goes home satisfied. Eventually they all die and are easily replaced. That’s what this record sounds like.

11. Oneohtrix Point Never – Garden Of Delete 

This makes my skin crawl in all the best ways. It’s like a slime that slowly creeps into my organs and makes them uncontrollably gush cortisol, even during the quieter moments. It’s a haphazard specter of aggression that floats in and floats out, leaving an oozing trail of nervous, giddy tension. I think at 23 I’m ready to enter my mallgoth phase. Never too late to party, they say.

10. Father John Misty – I Love You Honeybear

What a stinkin’ sadsack. I mean, he has a lot of good points and he sounds real nice for the most part. Gotta give him that. Alright I take back that first statement. FJM is a cool guy. The arrangements on these songs are so ace. DAMN!

9. Holly Herndon – Platform

Turn your brain into an iOS app in 50 quick minutes with Holly Herndon’s Platform. Enriched in aloe vera, sleek and stylish for nights on the town. Approval from friends and colleagues will rain upon you forever more. Never will a doubtful thought enter your brain zone, unless you’ve jailbroken it. Reboot not required, but encouraged.

8. Colin Stetson & Sarah Neufeld – Never Were The Way She Was

Big jazz sax boy Stetson meets fiddle slayer Neufeld. Results are expectedly excellent. Like a vicious, yet beautiful battle between snake and mongoose. Always churning and toe to toe, working in tandem and in discord.

7. Mount Eerie – Sauna

Many thanks to my lord and savior Phil Elverum for this pillar of oblivion to admire during this hellhole of a year.

6. Unknown Mortal Orchestra – Multi-Love

Sun baked grooves that make ya move, what else is there to prove, dude? Nothing.

5. Julia Holter – Have You In My Wilderness

The best dream pop record of this year, if you can even call it that. Transport me to this house of smoke and mirrors and strings, please.

4. Kendrick Lamar – To Pimp A Butterfly

I mean, duh.

3. Hop Along – Painted Shut

If you’ve never listened to Hop Along, you’re cheating yourself. All you need is the voice and you’re golden. Get everything else and you’re platinum. See them live? Woah now bud you’re pushing it. You’re gonna chrome yourself.

2. Bjork – Vulnicura

It’s Björk AND Arca AND Haxan Cloak. Did you somehow think it wouldn’t be either my #1 or #2 pick? Nah no one cares enough. It is #2 though. So that answers that.

1. Joanna Newsom – Divers

Well that was obvious. “Woah chill this ain’t as good as Have One On Me or Ys or Milk-Eyed Mender!” Haha woah please stop talking. This is my favorite record of the year. Bye!

You reached the end! Sorry for the long scroll and FJM-ness. Hope you enjoyed it anyways.

FULL LIST:

1. Joanna Newsom – Divers
2. Björk – Vulnicura
3. Hop Along – Painted Shut
4. Kendrick Lamar – To Pimp A Butterfly
5. Julia Holter – Have You In My Wilderness
6. Unknown Mortal Orchestra – Multi-Love
7. Mount Eerie – Sauna
8. Colin Stetson & Sarah Neufeld – Never Were The Way She Was
9. Holly Herndon – Platform
10. Father John Misty – I Love You Honeybear
11. Oneohtrix Point Never – Garden Of Delete
12. Viet Cong – Viet Cong
13. Kamasi Washington – The Epic
14. Krill – A Distant Fist Unclenching
15. Braids – Deep In The Iris
16. Sufjan Stevens – Carrie & Lowell
17. Eskimeaux – O.K.
18. Jessica Pratt – On Your Own Love Again
19. Chastity Belt – Time To Go Home
20. Majical Cloudz – Are You Alone?
21. Beach House – Depression Cherry
22. Tame Impala – Currents
23. Carly Rae Jepsen – E•MO•TION
24. Roman A Clef – Abandonware
25. Ava Luna – Infinite House
26. Julien Baker – Sprained Ankle
27. Chelsea Wolfe – Abyss
28. Saintseneca – Such Things
29. Prurient – Frozen Niagara Falls
30. Panda Bear – Panda Bear Meets The Grim Reaper
31. Yowler – The Offer
32. Natalie Prass – Natalie Prass
33. Torres – Sprinter
34. Mac DeMarco – Another One
35. Alex G – Beach Music
36. Young Fathers – White Men Are Black Men Too
37. Jamie xx – In Colour
38. Arca – Mutant
39. Colleen – Captain Of None
40. Daniel Bachman – River
41. Empress Of – Me
42. Seoul – I Become A Shade
43. Skylar Spence – Prom King
44. Steve Gunn & Black Twig Pickers – Seasonal Hire
45. 2814 – Birth Of A New Day
46. The Weather Station – Loyalty
47. Godspeed You! Black Emperor – Asunder, Sweet and Other Distress
48. Clarence Clarity – No Now
49. Palm – Trading Basics
50. Panopticon – Autumn Eternal